Well, Since I Opened the Can of Worms...
7 Comments Published by Kimmah on Sunday, September 14, 2008 at 6:48 PM.
Reasons I am no fan of Sarah Palin:
1. Her gratuitous use of her children when it suits her needs. When others try to hold her to some sort of consistent standard, she balks. Any mother who would put her children under the intense media spotlight knowing that it was going to be a messy, torrid affair is selfish and pathetic
2. Her total bullshit lies about everything from the bridge to nowhere to her lobbyist hired to suck at the teat of the DC Cash Cow full-time. She is the personification of Pork Barrel Spending and doesn't have the guts to admit it and move on.
3. She references her state's proximity to Russia as some sort of resume item. I don't give a rat's ass if you can see Putin himself out your igloo window, it doesn't equate experience in diplomacy.
4. She lied about going into Iraq and presented a gas-stop in Ireland as an actual visit to the country.
5. She left Wasilla in debt to the tune of 20 million, despite her own crowing about being a fiscal conservative. She was a terrible personnel manager by many accounts, too. Appointing ANYONE to a state-level position based on her childhood love of cows is a complete farce. Palin embodies everything about cronyism that is wrong with political posts.
6. Being mayor of a tiny-ass town or governor of a sparsely populated state with little interaction with other states in the US is technically 'executive' experience, but hell, GWB had far more executive experience than she has and his presidency has been a total clusterfuck.
7. Not knowing the exact nuances of the so-called Bush Doctrine is fine, but looking as if you've never heard of it or even bothered to study it a bit? Unacceptable. That would be like me running for a school board seat and not knowing what NCLB's basic tenets are. It's part of the damn job, moron.
8. Whining about the mean old press bullying you is not impressive. It is wimpy. Are you going to go hide in Mooseville when you don't want to deal with dudes at the G8? And even the mere appearance of believing the lipstick on a pig comment was directed to a description of her is dirty politicking and old-school DC antics that she is allegedly against--she's a complete hypocrite when she claims to be against the regular politics as usual.
9. I'm all for religion, but when you belong to a church that believes people speak in tongues or one that offers to cure gay people, I think your religion is up for scrutiny and it shows a great deal about one's thought process and level of intellect.
10. I do not respect her sarcastic, holier-than-thou digs made at Obama and Biden simply because she has earned exactly zero right to throw out commentary on anything until she is willing to speak to reporters or be interviewed on her own ideas.
11. She says she was a PTA mom like it is equivalent to a poli sci degree. Sorry, two frigging years in the backwoods PTA when her son was in elementary school is not the type of experience in consensus-building that 99.99999 percent of the the thinking world would imagine when asked to list relevant experience.
12. She named her children Track and Trig. I can overlook a lot of things, but saddling her child with the name Track is just unacceptable. Forever.
Sidenote: if you're bored, you might go check out
Your Palin Baby Name generator. My name is Steam Fangs Palin. Catchy, eh? Thanks to
Other issues:
Troopergate
Her husband's ties to AIP as well as her own participation in their activities
Her ties to Ted Stevens
Her flipping and flopping on everything so that she comes across as believing in nothing other than being a shrill harpy shrew with a terrible hairstyle and glasses that are supposed to make people take her more seriously. Perhaps if she said anything that was seriously intelligent, she might not have to resort to appearing as Miss Beadle's older sis on Little House on the Prarie.
I'm an education snob and six colleges in five years is not impressive to me in the least.
That's it for now--I'm going to go find something other than political news and blogs to read.
PS" Thanks to Sasha for sharing the name generator. Love it.
1. Her gratuitous use of her children when it suits her needs. When others try to hold her to some sort of consistent standard, she balks. Any mother who would put her children under the intense media spotlight knowing that it was going to be a messy, torrid affair is selfish and pathetic
2. Her total bullshit lies about everything from the bridge to nowhere to her lobbyist hired to suck at the teat of the DC Cash Cow full-time. She is the personification of Pork Barrel Spending and doesn't have the guts to admit it and move on.
3. She references her state's proximity to Russia as some sort of resume item. I don't give a rat's ass if you can see Putin himself out your igloo window, it doesn't equate experience in diplomacy.
4. She lied about going into Iraq and presented a gas-stop in Ireland as an actual visit to the country.
5. She left Wasilla in debt to the tune of 20 million, despite her own crowing about being a fiscal conservative. She was a terrible personnel manager by many accounts, too. Appointing ANYONE to a state-level position based on her childhood love of cows is a complete farce. Palin embodies everything about cronyism that is wrong with political posts.
6. Being mayor of a tiny-ass town or governor of a sparsely populated state with little interaction with other states in the US is technically 'executive' experience, but hell, GWB had far more executive experience than she has and his presidency has been a total clusterfuck.
7. Not knowing the exact nuances of the so-called Bush Doctrine is fine, but looking as if you've never heard of it or even bothered to study it a bit? Unacceptable. That would be like me running for a school board seat and not knowing what NCLB's basic tenets are. It's part of the damn job, moron.
8. Whining about the mean old press bullying you is not impressive. It is wimpy. Are you going to go hide in Mooseville when you don't want to deal with dudes at the G8? And even the mere appearance of believing the lipstick on a pig comment was directed to a description of her is dirty politicking and old-school DC antics that she is allegedly against--she's a complete hypocrite when she claims to be against the regular politics as usual.
9. I'm all for religion, but when you belong to a church that believes people speak in tongues or one that offers to cure gay people, I think your religion is up for scrutiny and it shows a great deal about one's thought process and level of intellect.
10. I do not respect her sarcastic, holier-than-thou digs made at Obama and Biden simply because she has earned exactly zero right to throw out commentary on anything until she is willing to speak to reporters or be interviewed on her own ideas.
11. She says she was a PTA mom like it is equivalent to a poli sci degree. Sorry, two frigging years in the backwoods PTA when her son was in elementary school is not the type of experience in consensus-building that 99.99999 percent of the the thinking world would imagine when asked to list relevant experience.
12. She named her children Track and Trig. I can overlook a lot of things, but saddling her child with the name Track is just unacceptable. Forever.
Sidenote: if you're bored, you might go check out
Your Palin Baby Name generator. My name is Steam Fangs Palin. Catchy, eh? Thanks to
Other issues:
Troopergate
Her husband's ties to AIP as well as her own participation in their activities
Her ties to Ted Stevens
Her flipping and flopping on everything so that she comes across as believing in nothing other than being a shrill harpy shrew with a terrible hairstyle and glasses that are supposed to make people take her more seriously. Perhaps if she said anything that was seriously intelligent, she might not have to resort to appearing as Miss Beadle's older sis on Little House on the Prarie.
I'm an education snob and six colleges in five years is not impressive to me in the least.
That's it for now--I'm going to go find something other than political news and blogs to read.
PS" Thanks to Sasha for sharing the name generator. Love it.
Labels: politics, stupid famous people
i'm one of the first people to get on her soapbox when there is some sort of miscarriage of justice. really, i am. but i'm having a hard time feeling too much sympathy for paris in her latest publicity whore moment.
see, i know that it's wrong for someone to be punished more harshly because of who they are. i really do, but dammit, i also have to say that it's refreshing to see someone who is white, rich and famous actually have to take her punishment like anyone else would because newsflash: there are unfair sentences passed down every day across this country. it's one of the little 'glitches' in the legal system that we value so much. so, so sorry paris, that you get to be the whipping girl, but in the grand scheme of things 23 or 40 days is a damn sight better than a life sentence.
this is what happens when you try make your career out of being rich, famous, 'hot' and outrageous. you have to be prepared to pay for it. and she is. hopefully she'll come out of this or at least less visible.
see, i know that it's wrong for someone to be punished more harshly because of who they are. i really do, but dammit, i also have to say that it's refreshing to see someone who is white, rich and famous actually have to take her punishment like anyone else would because newsflash: there are unfair sentences passed down every day across this country. it's one of the little 'glitches' in the legal system that we value so much. so, so sorry paris, that you get to be the whipping girl, but in the grand scheme of things 23 or 40 days is a damn sight better than a life sentence.
this is what happens when you try make your career out of being rich, famous, 'hot' and outrageous. you have to be prepared to pay for it. and she is. hopefully she'll come out of this or at least less visible.
Labels: stupid famous people
Too scattered to post on one topic:
1. Britney--I'll be writing you another letter, but for now, child, please be safe and don't eat a handful of Xanax or Valium. I swear, I don't think I could mentally survive another AnnaNicolesque macabre post-mortem DAWing. Oh, and for the love of God and all that is holy, when you get out of rehabd, buy a fucking wig that doesn't look like something I could buy in the clearance bin at Dollar Mart with the lavender lipstick and the red plastic earrings. And lose the brolly. It's bad for the image.
2. Just because one attends water aerobics class that is popular with the senior set, one should not assume it will be an "easy" workout. Trust me and my calves.
3. IT IS SUPPOSED TO SNOW IN FEBRUARY, DAMMIT! WHERE IS MY SNOW?
4. If you have not had a Special K Protein Bar in chocolate peanut butter, then you have missed out on a 10g treat. Yum. Yum. If you are my husband, you have now tried them, so stay away from them.
5. If it was possible to live off said bars and popcorn, then I would be the single happiest person on Earth.
6. I've been messages by some freaks on Myspace. If you have a young daughter, please do not let her have an account.
7. It dawned on me that my oldest child will soon be 14. How is this possible? I am not old enough to have a child that is 14. That's not a little kid anymore. Ugh.
8. Why is it that I am the only chick in the United States that cannot pull off the straight hair look, no matter how hard I try? All I can think of is cheap wig every time I try it. I will say that even then, my hair is miles better than that polyester shit that Britney is sporting.
9. I do love me some Tarte Cheek Stain. That stuff rocks--even if it is stupid expensive for blush. Tipsy is my shade of late.
10. Tyra needs to step away from the hot rollers. Just step away, girlfriend.
1. Britney--I'll be writing you another letter, but for now, child, please be safe and don't eat a handful of Xanax or Valium. I swear, I don't think I could mentally survive another AnnaNicolesque macabre post-mortem DAWing. Oh, and for the love of God and all that is holy, when you get out of rehabd, buy a fucking wig that doesn't look like something I could buy in the clearance bin at Dollar Mart with the lavender lipstick and the red plastic earrings. And lose the brolly. It's bad for the image.
2. Just because one attends water aerobics class that is popular with the senior set, one should not assume it will be an "easy" workout. Trust me and my calves.
3. IT IS SUPPOSED TO SNOW IN FEBRUARY, DAMMIT! WHERE IS MY SNOW?
4. If you have not had a Special K Protein Bar in chocolate peanut butter, then you have missed out on a 10g treat. Yum. Yum. If you are my husband, you have now tried them, so stay away from them.
5. If it was possible to live off said bars and popcorn, then I would be the single happiest person on Earth.
6. I've been messages by some freaks on Myspace. If you have a young daughter, please do not let her have an account.
7. It dawned on me that my oldest child will soon be 14. How is this possible? I am not old enough to have a child that is 14. That's not a little kid anymore. Ugh.
8. Why is it that I am the only chick in the United States that cannot pull off the straight hair look, no matter how hard I try? All I can think of is cheap wig every time I try it. I will say that even then, my hair is miles better than that polyester shit that Britney is sporting.
9. I do love me some Tarte Cheek Stain. That stuff rocks--even if it is stupid expensive for blush. Tipsy is my shade of late.
10. Tyra needs to step away from the hot rollers. Just step away, girlfriend.
Labels: advice, food, helpful beauty hints, ramble, stupid famous people
I'm a bitch about fashion and hair even though I really have no basis for making any statements about such things. I watch all the award shows and critique the appearance of those famous people because it's my way of living the high life without shopping anywhere more exotic than Target and Old Navy.
After the shows, I then sit through the countless fashion review shows and columns because I'm just that pathetic. So, as I've read and watched, I've been shocked and dismayed that no one has called Christina Aguilera to the red carpet for her horrific choices in hair and makeup:
Girl looks like she needs to wash her dirrty face and that hair? OMG, her hair. Who on earth does this girl's hair? She has GRAY roots. Gray. Who in the world strives to have gray roots? And then lets them be visible for photos and television coverage? It boggles my mind. She's trying to be all galm, forties, pin-up, but she looks like a characature and I do not mean that in any sort of good way.
Her Ungaro dress? Eh, pretty enough, but until she takes control of her hair and face she's dead to me.
After the shows, I then sit through the countless fashion review shows and columns because I'm just that pathetic. So, as I've read and watched, I've been shocked and dismayed that no one has called Christina Aguilera to the red carpet for her horrific choices in hair and makeup:
Girl looks like she needs to wash her dirrty face and that hair? OMG, her hair. Who on earth does this girl's hair? She has GRAY roots. Gray. Who in the world strives to have gray roots? And then lets them be visible for photos and television coverage? It boggles my mind. She's trying to be all galm, forties, pin-up, but she looks like a characature and I do not mean that in any sort of good way.
Her Ungaro dress? Eh, pretty enough, but until she takes control of her hair and face she's dead to me.
Labels: bitchy, hair stuff, stupid famous people
Reason #234 I'd Never Wear a Wig
0 Comments Published by Kimmah on Thursday, June 29, 2006 at 3:41 PM.
Obviously wearing a wig is hazardous to your mental health. May I present Exhibit A?:
I'm not sure if it is the fact that the scalp doesn't get enough exposure to oxygen and sunlight or if the actual structure of the wig squeezes the capillaries too tightly or maybe, just maybe, there's toxins in the glue, but Star Jones isn't a stupid woman. Arrogant, obnoxious, loud, tacky, overbearing, self-obsessed, yes, but stupid? No. So, there has to be some other reason for her stupidity beyond all reason for thinking that it was a good idea and a smart career move to take a big ol' screw you swipe at Barbara Walters on live television. I mean, you can think that maybe she was getting some bad advice--obviously she's got some terrible synocphantic people working for her or she'd never have tried the whole "pay for my wedding" or "I'm an author" gig or the most offensive of all "Star! on the red carpet" travesty--but I can sort of see where those ideas might have had a positive spin on them to someone who has no qualms about putting her own portrait in her bathroom. There's no excuse, no logical reason to think that anything good was gonna come out of trying to play the martyr and paint Barbara et al as the enemy.
So, it has to be the wigs. Never wear a wig, my children, never wear a wig.
I'm not sure if it is the fact that the scalp doesn't get enough exposure to oxygen and sunlight or if the actual structure of the wig squeezes the capillaries too tightly or maybe, just maybe, there's toxins in the glue, but Star Jones isn't a stupid woman. Arrogant, obnoxious, loud, tacky, overbearing, self-obsessed, yes, but stupid? No. So, there has to be some other reason for her stupidity beyond all reason for thinking that it was a good idea and a smart career move to take a big ol' screw you swipe at Barbara Walters on live television. I mean, you can think that maybe she was getting some bad advice--obviously she's got some terrible synocphantic people working for her or she'd never have tried the whole "pay for my wedding" or "I'm an author" gig or the most offensive of all "Star! on the red carpet" travesty--but I can sort of see where those ideas might have had a positive spin on them to someone who has no qualms about putting her own portrait in her bathroom. There's no excuse, no logical reason to think that anything good was gonna come out of trying to play the martyr and paint Barbara et al as the enemy.
So, it has to be the wigs. Never wear a wig, my children, never wear a wig.
Labels: stupid famous people
Dear Britney Spears-
I know that you don't know who the hell I am and that's okay, hon. Most people don't, but that's why I thought you needed to hear from me. See, the people that you do know are either too nice, too busy or just too scared to tell you what you need to hear. Me? I'm not one for keeping my mouth shut. So here goes.
You're not a little girl anymore, Brit. You're a mommy now. Mommies don't go around looking as if they are wearing their bath towels as a dress or as if they are in danger of having their oobies bursting out of their tank tops. Now, I know. You live out there where there is a little bit of a skewing on what is in good taste for maternity wear, but let me just assure you--terry cloth? Never a good choice. Denim cut offs on national television when you are over 16 and pregnant? I know you have a mother. Please. And tank tops--just stop that. Now. Embrace the fact that you can now wear the cute maternity tops that cover your body and appreciate the fact that you are getting older. With age comes wisdom and, I hope a full length mirror or two because you need to start checking out the whole package before you leave the homestead. Carring a baby makes the clothes, um, shift, shall we say? And that isn't a good thing when your skirt was only belt-long to begin with.
And, I might add, with age also comes good skin and hair care. Who ever is bleaching your hair is not doing you justice, so you might want to ask him to lighten up on the peroxide and consider a little more honey-tones. Oh, and that cute short cut you had was just adorable. If you're not going to feel like, you know, brushing/washing/styling your hair when you go out, then don't keep it so long. It's going to be even more difficult to deal with when Baby 2 comes along. IIf your hair was a shorter and maybe a little darker..okay, a lot darker...you won't need to keep punishing your skin with the tanning because trust me, you're going to be paying for that one before you know it. Oh, and, dare I say...the eyeliner? Well, I do love me some eyeliner about as much as anyone, but less can actually be more. At least when dealing with black kohl rings. Check out taupe or brown or plum. They're fun, too!
Those things, though, are really not what I wanted to talk to you about, so I hope you're not too made to stay with me. What we really need to focus on is the train wreck that you've become and what the hell you can do about it because honey, I hate to say it, but when I see you, your facial expressions and gestures have the appearance of some weird morph of of Courtney Love and Andrea Yates with a little twist of Michael Jackson thrown in about right now and that's just not good no matter how you factor it.
I hope you've got a good therapist, but if you don't--go get one. Today. Not one of those freaky Tom Cruise or Kabballah-like new religion ones. I mean an honest-to-God Dr. Therapist. Call UCLA or Stanford and get the best one they have on staff, dammit. I'm sure your medical will cover it. Prayer is lovely, but you need more than prayer right now--post-partum depression isn't fun for anyone, but out in public and while pregnant again? Hell, every mother in the world is screaming at you to go.
Then, once you've made that appointment, B, you need to find some friends who are real people. That's going to be the tough part because I have a sneaking suspicision that everyone you are friends with is either famous, rich, related to you or works for you. They won't count. They're all "poisoned" in one way or another for you right now--you need to be "normal" and see what "normal" people talk about and do for a bit (you won't think it's so much fun to clean toilets, I assure you). You need someone to tell you that you look like hell, you need sleep, you need to straighten the hell up and get your act in gear. You also need someone to tell you that you're not the worst person in the world and have some objectivity when they say that. You need someone to take those frigging socks off your husband when he's wearing sandals, too, btw, but I guess that's probably pushing it. You need someone to sit around and have the babies play in the backyard and then worry about making dinner. You need to have someone to talk about puke and poop with..the baby kind, of course.
Naturally, it's easy for me to say this from where I sit because no one took a picture of me when I tripped in New York in April (I wasn't even carrying a baby or a glass, but I damn near wiped out right in the middle of the street--thank God there wasn't a picture). I had plenty of people to talk to when I was pregnant all three times, but you know what? I still had a rip-roaring case of PPD after the third kid and I nearly went to the looney bin. In fact, I think I even asked my husband to take me there at one point. To say I was a wreck would be putting it mildly--but it's one of those things you don't realize until you're in the crosshairs and then it's too late. So, get out of the line of fire while you can. Go immerse yourself in normalcy--if you can't find "real" people, go make up a name and be MommytobeinCali06 on some parenting board. You can talk about housecleaning, diapers, and baby clothes all day long. I just wouldn't mention the whole carseat thing if I were you--carseat mommies can get REALLY ugly on those boards. Oh, and whatever you do, don't bring up spanking or vaccinations--there's never a good outcome there. Unless, of course, you like to see the fur fly. If you do, then you can have a lot of fun. If you REALLY want to mix it up, casually mention that you sometimes use duct tape to hold the kiddo's paci in at night--you wouldn't believe how limited some people's sense of humor is, but I digress.
Straighten up, chick. You're a mess and the whole world can see it. I'm not saying that to be mean, I'm saying it because it's true. Get your head out of your boobs, put on some shoes and get some help. Then worry about dealing with all the other shit--it's not important in the end if you're in a psych ward somewhere licking batteries and finger painting with pudding. Go. Now.
Your friend that you've never met before--
Kimmah
P.S.--If ever see you with a big wad of chaw in your mouth again in an interview, I reserve the right to come slap it out of your more-expensive-than-my-car-teeth myself. Sweet Jesus, girl, can't you hear that racket?
I know that you don't know who the hell I am and that's okay, hon. Most people don't, but that's why I thought you needed to hear from me. See, the people that you do know are either too nice, too busy or just too scared to tell you what you need to hear. Me? I'm not one for keeping my mouth shut. So here goes.
You're not a little girl anymore, Brit. You're a mommy now. Mommies don't go around looking as if they are wearing their bath towels as a dress or as if they are in danger of having their oobies bursting out of their tank tops. Now, I know. You live out there where there is a little bit of a skewing on what is in good taste for maternity wear, but let me just assure you--terry cloth? Never a good choice. Denim cut offs on national television when you are over 16 and pregnant? I know you have a mother. Please. And tank tops--just stop that. Now. Embrace the fact that you can now wear the cute maternity tops that cover your body and appreciate the fact that you are getting older. With age comes wisdom and, I hope a full length mirror or two because you need to start checking out the whole package before you leave the homestead. Carring a baby makes the clothes, um, shift, shall we say? And that isn't a good thing when your skirt was only belt-long to begin with.
And, I might add, with age also comes good skin and hair care. Who ever is bleaching your hair is not doing you justice, so you might want to ask him to lighten up on the peroxide and consider a little more honey-tones. Oh, and that cute short cut you had was just adorable. If you're not going to feel like, you know, brushing/washing/styling your hair when you go out, then don't keep it so long. It's going to be even more difficult to deal with when Baby 2 comes along. IIf your hair was a shorter and maybe a little darker..okay, a lot darker...you won't need to keep punishing your skin with the tanning because trust me, you're going to be paying for that one before you know it. Oh, and, dare I say...the eyeliner? Well, I do love me some eyeliner about as much as anyone, but less can actually be more. At least when dealing with black kohl rings. Check out taupe or brown or plum. They're fun, too!
Those things, though, are really not what I wanted to talk to you about, so I hope you're not too made to stay with me. What we really need to focus on is the train wreck that you've become and what the hell you can do about it because honey, I hate to say it, but when I see you, your facial expressions and gestures have the appearance of some weird morph of of Courtney Love and Andrea Yates with a little twist of Michael Jackson thrown in about right now and that's just not good no matter how you factor it.
I hope you've got a good therapist, but if you don't--go get one. Today. Not one of those freaky Tom Cruise or Kabballah-like new religion ones. I mean an honest-to-God Dr. Therapist. Call UCLA or Stanford and get the best one they have on staff, dammit. I'm sure your medical will cover it. Prayer is lovely, but you need more than prayer right now--post-partum depression isn't fun for anyone, but out in public and while pregnant again? Hell, every mother in the world is screaming at you to go.
Then, once you've made that appointment, B, you need to find some friends who are real people. That's going to be the tough part because I have a sneaking suspicision that everyone you are friends with is either famous, rich, related to you or works for you. They won't count. They're all "poisoned" in one way or another for you right now--you need to be "normal" and see what "normal" people talk about and do for a bit (you won't think it's so much fun to clean toilets, I assure you). You need someone to tell you that you look like hell, you need sleep, you need to straighten the hell up and get your act in gear. You also need someone to tell you that you're not the worst person in the world and have some objectivity when they say that. You need someone to take those frigging socks off your husband when he's wearing sandals, too, btw, but I guess that's probably pushing it. You need someone to sit around and have the babies play in the backyard and then worry about making dinner. You need to have someone to talk about puke and poop with..the baby kind, of course.
Naturally, it's easy for me to say this from where I sit because no one took a picture of me when I tripped in New York in April (I wasn't even carrying a baby or a glass, but I damn near wiped out right in the middle of the street--thank God there wasn't a picture). I had plenty of people to talk to when I was pregnant all three times, but you know what? I still had a rip-roaring case of PPD after the third kid and I nearly went to the looney bin. In fact, I think I even asked my husband to take me there at one point. To say I was a wreck would be putting it mildly--but it's one of those things you don't realize until you're in the crosshairs and then it's too late. So, get out of the line of fire while you can. Go immerse yourself in normalcy--if you can't find "real" people, go make up a name and be MommytobeinCali06 on some parenting board. You can talk about housecleaning, diapers, and baby clothes all day long. I just wouldn't mention the whole carseat thing if I were you--carseat mommies can get REALLY ugly on those boards. Oh, and whatever you do, don't bring up spanking or vaccinations--there's never a good outcome there. Unless, of course, you like to see the fur fly. If you do, then you can have a lot of fun. If you REALLY want to mix it up, casually mention that you sometimes use duct tape to hold the kiddo's paci in at night--you wouldn't believe how limited some people's sense of humor is, but I digress.
Straighten up, chick. You're a mess and the whole world can see it. I'm not saying that to be mean, I'm saying it because it's true. Get your head out of your boobs, put on some shoes and get some help. Then worry about dealing with all the other shit--it's not important in the end if you're in a psych ward somewhere licking batteries and finger painting with pudding. Go. Now.
Your friend that you've never met before--
Kimmah
P.S.--If ever see you with a big wad of chaw in your mouth again in an interview, I reserve the right to come slap it out of your more-expensive-than-my-car-teeth myself. Sweet Jesus, girl, can't you hear that racket?
Labels: advice, stupid famous people
