I love spring--it makes me feel all renewed and invigorated. Thus, I will blog some. I think. Or maybe just via twitter and email, but communicate about my brain somehow, I will.

Labels: blogger, ramble

If I were to be driving along a fairly busy four-lane road and say, accidentally nearly hit a couple of Amish guys standing on the yellow line trying to cross traffic because I wasn't as alert as I should have been...well, nearly hit is such a strong phrase...more like, swerved and potentially startled a couple of Amish men..okay, scared them a bit...not like 'peeing in their pants' scared, but 'OMFG get out of the way' scared...well, without the F and G part of that acronym since I guess they wouldn't say "fucking" or take God's name in vain in a moment of life-or-death fear... although I've seen a couple of those Dateline specials about how wild and crazy some Amish guys can be in their youth and once you've experienced the effectiveness of expressing anger, fear, confusion, disgust and the like by the use of gratuitous swear word, it might be that you can't put that Genie/genie back in the proverbial bottle (slightly OT...would an Amish person get that Genie/genie reference reference?), so who knows what they might say....aw, fuck, I've totally lost my train of thought now....oh, yeah. Would God hold me to a stiffer penalty if I caused life-altering fear/pain/death to the Amish or are they worth the same hellfire as regular people. By regular people I mean you and me, not, say a crackhead or a Ted-Bundy-in-training or a politician or whack job like ol' Rev. Phelps.

Thus endeth my philosophical rambling for today.

Labels: burning questions, inquiring minds, ramble, religion

Then read about MY day yesterday--Thursday, June 4, which is evidently the day of Satan.
After staying up waaaay too late, I got up at 4 to get sarah and the girls off to Calgary. She stayed here with me because it's closer to the airport (I'm in Hixon at my parents' house). I went out to check my van because we were afraid that a light had been left on last night--it had not, but I left the keys in it like a dumbass. turned to the kill-the-battery-position and then left them there for close to an hour.

We get outside with the girls to leave and my fucking van wouldn't start. Igo tearing around the house and get dad's Jeep keys, start the jeep--thinking that surely he has jumper cables or we can drive it if we have to. I can't get the back doors unlocked for some reason, so i get out--with it running--and shut the door. as SOON as I shut it, I realised that I had locked it. so now the Jeep is running with the keys locked in it AND the van won't start. Sarah is starting to panic and the girls are getting freaked.

I had to call Daddy and wake him up---3.55 a.m. mountain time. He told me where to find more jeep keys AND that he doesn't have jumper cables here, so I can't jump it off. there are no backseats in the Jeep and it is loaded with tools and stuff. Well, if you know my parents, then you know that means there is only one vehicle left to choose from (techincally, there are three, but the VW Thing isn't running and there's no way in hell I'd drive the 64 1/2 Mustang....that leaves the 15 passenger white Dodge van affectionately known 'round these parts as Big Ugly. It's a leftover from my parents' antique show hauling days and they still use it for camping. I have never driven it before--for good reason.

Sarah and I unloaded her four lead-filled suitcases, along with the biggest jogging stroller on the planet, all the kids' stuff and piled into Big Ugly, which I then proceeded to drive to the airport. My parents' driveway isn't long, but it's got a weird curve, so I always turn around and drive out 'normal' in my own car. Given my luck of the day, I wasn't about to chance turning around--I'm sure I would have hit my van, the house or backed off the edge of the driveway, so with Sarah hanging out one door and me the other, I successfully made it out fhe drive in reverse.Yay for me! Once we got out of the driveway, it was a piece of cake, but my nerves were shot. Got to the airport in plenty of time.

I returned home. Tried my van...it started. I was like, WTF?, but glad that I wouldn't have to bother anyone. Oh, silly Kim, if you'd only known.

I went back in and cleaned up, washed the sheets that we'd used, showered, dressed, packed, etc. Around 10.45 or so I went out and tried the car again--it started. Then, like a complete Simpleton, I turned off the van, plugged my cell phone into the car charger and left the motherfucking side door open. Didn't even cross my feeble mind that I should have left it running.

You can guess what happened next---the damn thing was deader than hell when I went back out. I gave it an hour. Still nothing, so I had to call Aunt Barbara to come jump me off. Bless her heart, she came right over and we managed to get it running. Whew. Off to home.

Or not.

After driving all around southeastern Tennessee, the Check Transmission message started blinking at me and my overdrive light began to flash as I drove down Amnicola Highway. Even a mechanical ignoramous such as myself knew that this was bad. I found a place to pull over, called W. in a panic. He said to check the trans. fluid and add some. (Sidenote--my van had been driving oddly all weekend, but I didn't really put it all together at the time). I made it to a Conoco, which didn't carry the fluid, but I checked my level there and I was almost totally out. Yikes.

Drove a little bit further, praying all the way that the transmission wouldn't just lock up on me. Made it to a Chevron. Bless the lovely man who worked there. He called me "Sunshine" and helped me put the fluid in, check everything. I felt confident that the worst was behind me.

I? am notorious for being inept at judging the future and this? was another example.

I start driving down Amnicola again and get to almost the same exact spot and the frigging transmission light comes on. Fuck me. I managed to pull over and drive up a block or so to an empty parking lot...this involved going up a hill and I wasn't entirely sure I was even going to make it, but I did. I got out and checked. Damn fluid was empty. I looked under the van for the obvious and yes, there where even I, Kim the Automotive Moron, could see it was transmission fluid flowing freely out and making an impressive puddle on the pavement. The black asphalt pavement. The black asphalt pavement that was super heated because it was about 95 degrees outside and there wasn't a lick of shade.

More panicked calls. Clearly I wasn't going anywhere in the van. I'm smart like that. After much, much cursing and such, I had to call Aunt Barbara yet again to come get me. As I waited for her, I got hotter and hotter. I swear I have never sweated so much in my whole entire life. I had sweat rolling down the backs of my legs. Nasty.

To make this incredibly long story a little shorter, I will spare you the details about trying to figure out where to take my car. I knew that the Ford dealership was my last resort because those folks are slow as Christmas and dumber than shit. After calling like a million people that live in and around Chatanooga, friend from high school, David Poe, found me a place to take it, but they didn't advertise transmission work. I was going to call them and see what they suggested, but then my dad remembered that the name of the place where he had the Mustang worked on is called Mr. Transmission. Needless to say, my search for a mechanic was over.

So here I sit in my parents' house with pretty much nothing to do. Car was towed today to Soddy Daisy and will hopefully be repaired cheaply and quickly. I'm just going to stay here until the weekend when the kids get back from their trip out West with Mom and Dad. And I'll probably be driving the Jeep home, which makes my back and knee hurt just thinking about it--stick shift, no frills, three hour trip. Ugh.

I have been to Walgreens and bought mascara and lipstick because they were on sale. Had a prescription for Tramadol transferred here so I won't be forced to go seek out drug dealers w/ Percocet or Demerol downtown. I'm going to ice and heat my back and just listen to the silence for a couple of days. And try not to go bonkers in the process.

So unless you ate accidentally live slug for breakfast or you peed yourself in public yesterday, consider your day much better than mine.

Labels: dumb shit I do, my life, pictures, ramble, rant, travel

I'm glad the holidays are officially over. From Thanksgiving thru Easter there seem to be a million different reasons to eat candy and other junk food. Now it has all passed. Fourth of July candy doesn't really appeal to me, lol.

It's Spring Break, but I'm working a few hours each day Monday-Thursday. The kids have lots of things going on this week and we'll be fairly crazed leading up to our trip to Chatt. I'm hoping I can just get my act together and get some things done house-wise. That's the plan, anyway.

Labels: ramble, work stuff

MIL gave me 100 bucks to add to my cash stash, so today SIL and I headed out to the new Super Target at the crack of dawn so I could spend it.

I found THE most gorgeously fun shoes for only $22, but I didn't get them because I realized that I didn't really have anything to actually wear them with. I'm going to go back, though. I need them. They are linen and brown 'leather' with like a 3" or so heel that is covered with brown textured stuff. Love them. I also found some really comfy black platform heels that were probably 3.5", but they had an open toe and I really don't need yet another pair of open-toed heels, so I put them back. I will be watching for them on clearance, though.

I didn't buy anything for myself at Target other than a pair of St. Patrick's Day socks from the 1.00 bin and a beach towel for 4.00. I managed to spend $82.00 on family stuff, including Sam's Easter basket present. When we left there, we hit the new Kohl's, which has just opened this week. There I managed to find two pair of shoes that actually met my footwear needs--a pair of slightly rounded-toe (closed, obviously) black pumps with a high enough heel to be dressy, but not so high I can't wear them to work and a really cute pair of brown slingbacks with a faux wooden heel. Both were Vera Wang's brand and on sale. Then I found a couple of pair of earrings (more on the earring developments later) and with the $10 gift card that SIL gave me (thank you, J!), I spent $99.18. Woohooo!!

Then I went to TJ Maxx and bought a great little Pucciesque print knit dress--BCBG--for a mere $29.00 and a basic white shirt--high waisted with a little belt to break it up--for $16.00. I had an exchange to make, so it came out to like $32.00 for those.

Finally, I hit the Wal Mart and grabbed up a couple more pair of earrings. I had $30 in GC for there, but I ended up spending them mostly on Easter candy and some groceries and frigging $10 worth of light bulbs for Jay's reading lamp. I decided that I'd consider using my money for that a trade off for spending at TJ Maxx, so I still have about $25 or so in my cash stash to put toward sandals or girly things.

I feel very shopped out and I still have to buy more groceries, but now I have lots of earrings to choose from when I go.

Tonight I have to go chaperone a dance for about an hour. Wooo.Hooo. Not. Then I think I'm going to go out to dinner with friends for my bday. W. isn't going to go because he's sick, so it won't be a late night, nor a particularly inebriated one, I suppose. That's a good thing, though. I tried on clothes at Target and felt enormously fat. Blech. Oh, that reminds me, I did buy myself something at Target--whoops. I got some khaki Bermudas. I lvoe Target's brand because they are totally vanity sized.

Labels: fashion, good times, ramble

1. I'm tired of being tired.

2. I have strained my left tricep. I'm beginning to think that this whole exercise thing is just too dangerous for some people.

3. I love biscuits.

4. I also love lima beans.

5. And meatloaf.

6. Stupidity really makes my head hurt lately.

7. I do not feel 39 at all.

8. I wish it was NFL time. Basketball sucks.

9. One of my couch cushions is noticeably cleaner than the others. I wonder if that Resolve upholstery cleaner is any good?

10. We had a cow slaughtered and processed- $196 for 585 pounds of beef. That is .34 per pound--steaks, roasts, and loads of ground beef. Guess what we'll be eating this spring and summer? I've been paying $2.00+ per pound for ground round.

11. I have fifty dollars in my cash stash drawer. This is pathetic, but I cannot remember the last time that I intentionally set aside cash to have for miscellaneous purposes. I'm soooo bad with money. This fifty makes me feel very happy. I'm putting ten bucks per week in the drawer. I think I will use it to buy myself a new swimsuit. Or some really great spring/summer shoes. Or to pay school fees for next year. Ugh. Kids are so expensive.

12. Our school has a new dress code next year--the kids have to wear solid shirts w/ a collar in one of six colors--navy and white are the county-wide colors and then our school added light blue, red, black and pink. Naturally we have approximately five shirts between three kids that will meet these regulations. I imagine part of #11 will also be used to purchase school shirts. I'm conflicted about this--I like the idea of being able to dress them easier and in the long run, it will make life easier because we won't have so many clothes, but I also hate the idea of seeing nothing but blue and red and the occassional pink. It's going to be weird.

13. My parents' 41st anniversary is coming up and I want to send them something because I never do. I'm thinking about an edible fruit bouquet, but they're sort of pricey and my mother could make one of them on her own for far less and that nags at the one frugal bone I have. But the idea of presents is to splurge on a treat, right? Ugh. I don't know.

14. I cannot believe that The Closer won't start new episodes until frigging JULY. Pisses me off.

Labels: food, my life, pain in general, physical exertion, ramble, who doesn't love a list

Sister and I are hanging at my parents' house for the weekend in honor of my sister's bday and Christmas. Via the wonder that is myspace, I tracked down a guy from high school that was in the band with us and he's doing karaoke at a bar here, so S. and I went to see him tonight. It was rather eerie because he and my sister both look VERY much like they did in high school (a few pounds, but otherwise no change). Then we listened to loads of singers performing songs from our 80's high school days--most of them were fairly decent, which was suprising. I'm sure the quality declined as the night went on.

I've been coming to Chattanooga on a fairily regular basis and it's been sort of like a time warp for me in a way. I grew up here (for the most part, we moved to the area when I was seven and left when I was twenty), but once I got married and the parentals moved to WV, I stopped going down there, so that was a span of nearly 15 years that I was out of the loop. Now coming back it's rather bizarre to see how things change and stay the same.

Labels: getting old, ramble

Homer is still very palpable. Dr. said two weeks...it's been two tomorrow and no signs of leaving any time soon. I'm so over this. I'm tired of not being able to walk normally or put weight on my knee with any certainty.

In other news, I now have heat in my van--I'd been driving around under a down throw and a fleece while bundled up like Nanook of the North's older, grumpier sister with a military fettish (I don't own a coat, so I wore W.'s Army jacket and I don't have decent gloves, so I snagged Jay's black and white camo fleeces). Oh, and the only way to keep the windshield clear was to run the A/C. It was 29 degrees or so the past two days.

I'm ready for a snow day, dammit.

Labels: ramble, rant

1. On my design in the previous blog, I thought the print was black, hence the red belt and black tank. I only later realized that the print was actually more maroon, which really made it look rather spastic. This is not unlike the navy socks I wore with black shoes not too long ago (why I even OWN navy socks is a question that I still cannot answer since I own no navy shoes or pants).

2. Dr. Phil is a wanker.

3. I can't quite put my finger on why I want to put my fingers in my ears and chant "La, la, la, la, la" when Hilary Clinton is talking, but I just do.

4. I could never vote for a man named Mitt.

5. I feel sorry for crazy Britney Spears.

6. There are only so many ways one can wear yoga pants and still create an interesting look.

7. The god-awful hematoma on the back of my knee (it is at least the size of an egg) refuses to shrink or drain. I have to admit that I am actually hoping it will somehow just pop, rather like the world's biggest zit (but only if I am at home. God forbid it should happen at Kroger).

8. I have LOST my new underwear. Not in an exciting or sleazy way, mind you. I just cannot figure out where I put the packages that I bought at Fred's before Christmas.

9. Fred's and Roses intrigue me in a way that I simply cannot explain. They are both meccas of white trash bargains, but I am inexplicably drawn to them and find myself looking at CLOTHING there. I bought three shirts and a pair of Levi's at Roses recently (ask me what size those jeans are. Just ask me). I do not own any clothing from Fred's, but my favorite gloves (one of which I have lost, natch) came from there.

10. Chocolate Lucky Charms, or the generic version thereof, makes me happy.

Labels: fashion, ramble, underwear, who doesn't love a list

It is much easier to plan things to do on your day off than it is to actually execute them? I had a long list of things that I couldn't wait to tackle today, but instead of working like a little bee, I've been dozing like a big ol' sloth. I got home from my doctor's appointment where I had stitches rather painfully removed and went straight for the pain meds and the couch. I've been here ever since--sort of half asleep, half awake. I've no real idea of what I've done for the past almost-three hours. I've read various online blatherings, checked my email, looked up vitamins and watched about 30 minutes of Atonement on a bootleg website (Keira Knightley's jaw bothers me to no end). I am fighting the urge to just hunker down, cover my head and go to sleep. Trying to decide why it would be a bad idea.

Labels: ramble

Tomorrow is the first day back to work after Christmas break. It's a teacher work day, which is a great thing, but I'm only going in for a few hours and then I'm going to be homebound until Monday. I'm staying home to let the knee get a little bit better before I take a chance on going to work for a long day. I have my disability insurance, which will pay me for the days, so I decided to take it easy and not strain the knee. It's still looking pretty nasty and I don't go back to the doctor until Thursday.

I've got a lot of stuff to do around the house, so hopefully I'll be able to get a few things done without my three helpers under foot. For now, I'm going to sit around and watch some more Law and Order marathon on TNT and enjoy mynew flannel jammies, cozy slippers and fabulous down throw. I had a very lovely Christmas.

Labels: holidays, ramble, work stuff

For the past several years, it has seemed as if Christmas sort of snuck up on me. I haven't really been in the mood for it all. This year, though, I was determined to be ahead of the game and get the 'must-have' presetnts in plenty of time, have my house cleaned, etc.

Naturally, I ended up having knee surgery instead. This one was much more involved than the three previous ones, so it's meant a lot more down time than usual and much more than I can really stand.

So, instead of being ready at Thanksgiving for the Christmas season, I ended up leaving all the decorations in the attic and only put up a tree yesterday. I decided that we would do kid-made decorations, so we hung the things that were made at school, plus anything that a student gave me this year. I went out and bought a few strands of colored lights to make it more cheerful--normally, I'm a white light kind of girl. Sam and I made snowflakes out of coffee filters and put them up there and that's about it. Naturally, we have a HUGE tree this year, so it defnitely looks a bit bare, but I sort of like how homey it looks. We may make this a yearly thing--for the one tree. Next year I fully intend to be in mega-holiday mode and have all my trees out, have the garland and knick knacks out and the wreaths hung. This year was just not the year for that--and I'm totally okay with that. Sometimes you need to just step back and take a break. W. and I are really focusing on the kids this year and making Christmas about people more than gifts or hoopla. Sam, in particular, has really been full of Christmas spirit. He is quick to tell anyone who mentions gifts that Chirstmas isn't about getting stuff--it's about Jesus and love. He's a smart one, my Sam.

Because I have been hobbling around on one crutch in some questionable clothes (and in a Demerol-induced haze at times), I feel compelled to wrap up with the famous words of that little crutched boy, Tiny Tim:

Labels: holidays, ramble, serious

things i enjoy:

1. bananas
2. whole wheat baguettey french bread from kroger
3. max factor volume couture mascara in soft black or auburn
4. cheese
5. flip flops
6. laminating
7. sharp scissors
8. cheap bottled water from aldi
9. maroon 5
10. muscle sculpting classes at the Y
11. digital cameras
12. pedicures
13. cinnamon graham crackers
14. short hair
15. hot tubs
16. boats
17. banana boat sunscreen spray
18. ipod
19. dvr'd top chef and the closer
20. a well written sentence
21. london and new york
22. hair straightening products and utensils
23. myspace surveys
24. stila tinted moisturizer
25. cold zin
26. lavendar and maroon
27. blogs
28. freshmen
29. wedge sandals
30. grilled chicken

things i hate:

1. sweating in the car
2. leg cramps
3. yaz birth control pills
4. protein shakes
5. squash
6. putting away laundry
7. torturous undies
8. shaving my legs
9. 'pro' wrestling
10. senior girls with attitude
11. smelly middle schoolers
12. frigging legos
13. step aerobics
14. bad local commercials
15. morons on message boards
16. spammers on myspace
17. balancing my checking accounts
18. being late
19. being so far away from friends
20. dog hair
21. spider veins
22. hangnails
23. woody allen movies
24. road contruction
25. drunken neighbors
26. cartoons
27. arm fat
28. run on sentences
29. holy rollers
30. getting old

Labels: English, fashion, food, getting old, imaginary friends, inebriation, makeup, meme, physical exertion, ramble, stupid normal people, television, travel, who doesn't love a list

back-to-school is upon me. i left home at 10 this morning and did not get back for good until 8.30--i did come home long enough to check on the boys and run to kroger for them something for dinner.

my classroom looked like a tornado had struck. it's unreal the mess--a combination of factors at play: 12 years of accumulated teacher crap, i'm a packrat, i didn't file stuff at the end of the year, the painters totally trashed my floors, all of my desks plus another teacher's were heaped in the middle of my room, of my 9 computers, only two were on their correct table/desk with nothing else on top of them, part of my furniture was pulled apart, literally, and i had to empty a cabinet and a bookshelf to deal with the damage, i had about eight boxes of other people's crap in my room, i threw stuff in piles when the rains came, so there is no rhyme or reason, i can't open my desk drawers...and so on.

but today, things are MUCH better. i could teach if i had to, albeit maneuvering around piles of things i can't really totally identify. i have a shitload of filing and sorting to do (the 'put it all in a box' method is NOT effective) and i have to hang up all of my posters, which in itself will take a couple of hours because i have dozens.

i shall post before and after pics to impress everyone with my teacherly devotion.

tomorrow, wednesday, is our last full day to hang out at the pool, so we're heading over there around 11 and may not return until they close at 7 if we're so inclined and not sunburned or too cranky. thursday, i return to work for teacherish meetings and the whole 'get ready to start the school year' deal. i've already planned to work late that night, so i'm hoping that i won't have to spend the entire weekend getting things ready. i have vowed that i will not start the year off with things crammed in corners or shoved under tables--i'm sooooo sick of the chaos. i need calm and order as i face the 33 seniors in my brit lit class this year. yes, 33. last year? i had 12. talk about a drastic change. oy.

Labels: ramble, teaching, work stuff

Labels: hair stuff, narcotics, pain in general, physical exertion, ramble, television, who doesn't love a list

• that's really all i got.
• the closer is about to premier. i love the closer.
• i missed the first epi of top chef: miami. pisses me off, stupid dvr and stupid digital cable that doesn't 'see' bravo for some effed up reason.
• i am thru with summer school as of today. going back down to work in my room for a bit tomorrow evening, but that's MY choice, no kids, my time. the way i like it.
• i am having surgery of the knee a week from tomorrow--at least i think it is. that's the 26th, right? i'm totally out of it.
• mr. kim is taking anatomy and physiology this summer---i've not felt so dumb in a long, long time as i did when i tried to help him review. me? not so much a science girl. i know, you're shocked.
• i forgot that once upon a time, i was almost a mod at OT. talk about a flashback--ayak posted about it and it was like, 'hey! that's me!!' and can i just say, the drama from that year? not the mod stuff, but the rest of it? gah. live and learn and become a better person.
• and may i also just add that based on a post sunday night that nearly sent me into frigging coronary arrest, i'm GLAD i don't have to watch my tone or worry about 'playing favorites' there as a mod. argh....flames and steam are shooting from my head right now.
• sam hs been having me 'act out scenes' with him on the digital camera. in this scene, he is 'tarzan' and i'm supposed to be alternately puzzled and then scared. i'm not sure WHAT his looks were, but they sure are cute.
  
  
  

Labels: funny kids, mr kim, ramble, teaching, work stuff

i'm in absolute slug mode, which is condition normal, i have to admit. my house? a fricking wreck. my classroom? oy. it needs a separate post, but it was rained in again yesterday and i've got a pile of stuff to deal with. my van? must be cleaned.

and here i am, sitting on the couch, blogging.

i'm leaving for chattanooga/japser tomorrow right after work. i am spending two nights away from home. sam is going to spend the night with sil. this means clothing and such should be packed into some sort of recepticals. nothing is, of course. in fact, the gym bag i took with me last weekend? has yet to be unpacked.

i don't want to actually DO anything. must snap out of it--have lovely, visit with old friends, hang with my mom and aunt plans for wednesday-friday, but i'm guessing that wearing the same clothes all three days and not putting on any makeup or deodorant would probably mar those experiences somewhat.

am off. to pack. seriously. has to be done. am on it. right now. in a minute. just need to check my email......

Labels: my life, ramble, travel

from
jen


1. I've got the paperwork filled out to join the DAR should I ever choose to. Could also be in the Mayflower Society. Maybe when I'm older and have time to go to the meetings?

2. I've performed marriage ceremonies...three, I think. Can't remember exactly. I did them when I was a county commissioner, which is legal here in Tennessee.

3. I have bitten my fingernails as long as I can remember.

4. I cannot whistle. At all.

5. I've not had a carbonated beverage of any kind since September 2006. Don't plan on having one, either.

6. I think lima beans are the best beans. Could eat them every day.

7. The only "real" relationships that I had while I was in college were with guys that I knew from high school.

8. My best friend's husband is a defensive cooridinator/coach/something in the Canadin Football League.

I'm now tagging Puffy, Momma, and Tonya.

Labels: meme, mindless entertainment, ramble, who doesn't love a list

1. Chardonnay is not my favorite wine. I don't really know what is--but this isn't. Zin is definitely better. Just not sure what my fave is.

2. Sam just asked me if it was okay if he made his Spiderman Halloween costume (the kind with the padded pecs) be his "slumber suit." How the hell do you possibly say no to that--not that I would, anyway, but there's no way now.

3. Silk feels really good on bare skin, even when it's cheap. I think I'm going to have to splurge on good silk as a treat one day.

4. I'm not even remotely interested in seeing Spiderman 3 or Pirates of the Caribbean 3. I've not seen any of the first four movies and these will be no different.

5. There is no five tonight. I'm just going to stop here because I can. Oh, wait, as a public service announcement, go read the Blog of Chris aka Supes. It's phenomonal as usual. Fanfare might make him post more often.

Labels: funny kids, linkage, ramble, who doesn't love a list

go read my london blog. you'll think i'm insane. its in the blogroll.

Labels: imaginary friends, ramble

For some reason, I keep hitting Save As Draft when I'm trying to blog. Then I'm all surprised when I go to a blog and there is nothing new there. Meanwhile, drafts sit in the dashboard thing, just waiting to see the light of day. I never had this happen in the past. Just recently. So, FYI, hit PUBLISH when you want something to be seen. Otherwise, you're just spinning your blogging tires.

Have I mentioned that I loathe the new Blogger this week?

Labels: advice, blogger, going to watch video on Dweeze's blog, ramble

I've gotten rather lax on the blogging thing lately. Not exactly sure why--I just can't seem to focus long enough to type something out that makes sense. Probably because things in real life are rather hectic. My list:

1. School--spring break is upon us and that means that kids are in antsy mode. It's always fun to try and pound sentence structure and comma splices into the heads of vacation-minded 15-year-old boys.

2. School pt. 2--it has suddenly turned into summer, despite the impending SPRING break and we've been treated to high temps ranging from 82-88 this week. Sounds great? Well, it might if we were in an air conditioned building during the day. As we are not, it is like some form of torture. There has been no discernible breeze, no relief of any kind from my ancient fan, and no hint of artifical coolant. My room is on the west side of the building with 6-foot windows to let in loads and loads of blistering heat just in time for my class of 35 juniors and seniors. Sweltering doesn't even come close to describing it--actually, if we could just swelter, we'd be happy.

3. School pt. 3--because it's the end of the year and I teach seniors, it's also field trip time. Normally this happens in April-May, but we've started early this year. The new quarter started March 9. Since that day, I have not yet had all of my students in my 4th block Theatre Arts class (the one with 35 kids) at school and in class at the same time. Not one day. My attendance book looks like some sort of weird modern heiroglyphics with all the absents, tardies, field trips, doctor's notes and other sundry markings. It's a nightmare. Today was our last day of class because we have an assembly tomorrow. On the day before Spring Break. Good thing I don't give grades on written work in there or I'd never get the make-ups done.

4. School pt. 4--I'm on the retirement-party-planning committees for TWO different teachers this spring. I've also agreed to plan a little something for another teacher's 50th birthday on Friday. I also have to sort out three days' worth of lesson plans before I leave on Friday. I also have to clean off my desk. I also have to turn in my grade verifications. I also have to stay at school until seven again tomorrow night for inservice and then spend all day Friday in meetings that are stupid and boring and useless to anything that I do for a living.

5. Vacation--I leave for London on April 9. Wooohooo! That's a good thing. I'll be back on April 19.

6. Vacation pt. 2--Before I leave I have to pack up clothes for the kids to take to my parents' house for a week. I also need to clean my house because it is gross.

7. Vacation pt. 3--I haven't even thought about starting to pack for myself yet and I don't have any decent walking shoes. Oh, and London is insane expensive and I have not saved one penny toward spending money. Not one red cent.

8. Life in general--all I seem to have time for is wake up, work, home to eat, Y, home to put kids to bed, read online for an hour, go to bed. Something has to give.

9. Stupid things--oh, I also have time to go to the tanning bed. Skin cancer is a terrible thing and some day I'm going to really be pissed off at myself; however, I have no plans to quit going until I am suitably browned. I usually don't mind being fashionably pale, but for some reason this year, it has bugged me. Maybe because summer started in March.

10. Pets--we have a chick named Austin. Sam brought it home from school--they kept eggs in an incubator. If Austin survives chickhood, it will be a miracle. A bloody miracle. Sam has picked him up two dozen times a day, he's carried him around the house and he's taken him out to play in the front yard. Poor Austin has been a trooper through it al. I'll be most relieved when he goes to live at the farm--which shouldn't be much longer because he's got an incredible vertical jump and he's going to leap out of his box any minute. He bangs his head on the books we have covering him for every so often.

I think that's it for now. I'm going to attempt to catch up on blog reading. I don't have much faith that I will get far, though.

Labels: my life, ramble, rant, teaching, whine, work stuff

I've spent my Sunday watching E!. This includes, but it not limited to True Hollywood Story: Mean Girls (I've never seen this movie), Hip Hop Wives, Talk Soup and now, Rock Star Daughters. I think I can feel my brain solidifying even as I type.

What I should be doing is cleaning my house and sorting out winter vs. summer clothes. Naturally, I am not. Well, I am a little bit, but not very much. My goal is to have all the clean clothes put away by bedtime. Anything over that will be domestic gravy.

Labels: mindless entertainment, ramble, television

It's been a strange day, this, my 38th birthday. Good God, that looks really old. Anyway, my morning started off fairly well--got up on time, was ready for work early, no rush. Nice. Then I get to school and the first thing up is an exam for my British Lit class. One of the students happend to come up to me just before the class started and ask me a question about a worksheet that she had. At first I answered her without really thinking, then it dawned on me--the sheet she was showing me was an old copy of the exam. WHAT THE HELL? After a couple of questions, I quickly discovered that no student foul-play had occurred. What HAD occurred?

Labels: celebration, hair stuff, my life, ramble, rant

Courtesy of Sasha:

What kind of extremist are you? Your Result: Rational Person You consider these questions obvious straw men, designed to distract people from a meaningful investigation of facts and a serious discussion of relevant political issues. How boring.
Left-Wing Extremist
Moderate Extremist
Right-Wing Extremist
What kind of extremist are you? Make a Quiz

Yeah, I don't even really know what this means--I think I need sleep. Speaking of things I don't really grasp, I will confess here and now that I had absolutely no frigging clue that guiddity was a word. Furthermore, I would have thought that it was one of those fake, made-up, Harry Potteresque kind of words. Who knew? The most insipidly easy Word of the Day generator actually taught me something. I guess that speaks volumes about me, doesn't it?

Labels: English, meme, mindless entertainment, quizzes, ramble

That's the word of the day according the world's most insipid Word of the Day generator on the right over there. Seriously, the first three or four words that it generated were just insanely easy--germane, potentate, effusive and hoary come to mind--but I'm too lazy to remove it, plus I thought there might eventually be a good word or two, so I left it.

And today's word entertains me (I should have read my own blog before I posted the other thing below, eh?).

How appropriate, nay, I'll say GERMANE to this blog that virago means:
A large, strong, courageous or aggressive woman.

I need to incorporate that into my blog description, don't you think? Maybe edit it a bit and leave out the large part because, well, that's not so flattering really, no matter how true.

Labels: English, ramble

Too scattered to post on one topic:

1. Britney--I'll be writing you another letter, but for now, child, please be safe and don't eat a handful of Xanax or Valium. I swear, I don't think I could mentally survive another AnnaNicolesque macabre post-mortem DAWing. Oh, and for the love of God and all that is holy, when you get out of rehabd, buy a fucking wig that doesn't look like something I could buy in the clearance bin at Dollar Mart with the lavender lipstick and the red plastic earrings. And lose the brolly. It's bad for the image.

2. Just because one attends water aerobics class that is popular with the senior set, one should not assume it will be an "easy" workout. Trust me and my calves.

3. IT IS SUPPOSED TO SNOW IN FEBRUARY, DAMMIT! WHERE IS MY SNOW?

4. If you have not had a Special K Protein Bar in chocolate peanut butter, then you have missed out on a 10g treat. Yum. Yum. If you are my husband, you have now tried them, so stay away from them.

5. If it was possible to live off said bars and popcorn, then I would be the single happiest person on Earth.

6. I've been messages by some freaks on Myspace. If you have a young daughter, please do not let her have an account.

7. It dawned on me that my oldest child will soon be 14. How is this possible? I am not old enough to have a child that is 14. That's not a little kid anymore. Ugh.

8. Why is it that I am the only chick in the United States that cannot pull off the straight hair look, no matter how hard I try? All I can think of is cheap wig every time I try it. I will say that even then, my hair is miles better than that polyester shit that Britney is sporting.

9. I do love me some Tarte Cheek Stain. That stuff rocks--even if it is stupid expensive for blush. Tipsy is my shade of late.

10. Tyra needs to step away from the hot rollers. Just step away, girlfriend.

Labels: advice, food, helpful beauty hints, ramble, stupid famous people

I'm sitting here on my substantial posterior doing absolutley nothing today. W. is on a trip for the weekend, so it's just me and the boys. Well, not all of them--Five went to a church retreat last night and won't be home until Sunday, so it's just me and the little guys, but only until 4:00. At 4:00, they'll both be leaving--one to spend the night with MIL and the other to go to a Predators game, so it will be just me, myself and I for six or seven hours.

For some reason, perhapsin part because I'm just giddy at the prospect of being all alone this evening, I've been rendered immobile because I cannot seem to get up and do diddly today. It isn't the engaging content on the internet that's distracting me because I appear to be one of five people online today. It's not the television programming because right now its one of Court TVs true-crime shows and I have no clue what's going on. It isn't a lack of sleep because I went to bed at 10 and didn't wake until 8. I suppose it can only be one thing--I'm a lazy slug. *sigh*

Eventually I'm going to have to drag myself from my bed and supervise the showering and dressing of the two kiddos and make myself presentable. Then, I'll drop them where they need to be and proceed to my favorite steak place and get something takeout for dinner ( steak and chicken combo that is to die for...rib-eye and marinated chicken breast, both of which just melt in your mouth), eat in front of something on my DVR backlog, and at 7, treat myself to the movies-Music and Lyrics. I really SHOULD be cleaning something, sorting something or doing sme sort of household improvements or at the very least going to the Y and using some sort of equipment, but that just seems so very daunting right now. I really am a lazy slug, it seems.

Labels: food, going to watch video on Dweeze's blog, my life, physical exertion, ramble, rant

Am under threat of deletion from bookmark list and favorites by various individuals, so am forced to update blog in manner of favorite movie/book and merely blog out thoughts quickly so as to avoid said tragedy.

Life is most bothersome lately with the work and family and home and health things all converging upon my head at once, which should come as no suprise since this is about the 10th or 11th time that I've endured a back-to-school routine, but this one is particularly brutal thanks to the introduction of a foriegn element to my work habitat--water.

Last year, whilst I was strolling along the banks of the Thames, I knew that sheer and utter madness awaited me upon my return to the workplace due to a very unfortunate contrusction fuckery which is now known as "the middle school wing" but should, by all rights, purposes and intent be, in fact the high school wing, but I'm not one to carry a grudge a year or more later. Oh, no, not me. This fuckery, however, did cause major mishaps in my classroom in the manner of a plague of dust and construction destruction that no one bothered to clean up whilst I was taking said strolls, so I spent the better part of a semester, nay, three quarters, cleaning up grit and grime from the various intrusions into my domain in order to hook various bits and pieces to the "middle school wing". Finally, sometime in late January, the wing was at least opened and they stopped using my room as a vehicle for abstract pipe art and weird metal boxy coverings and I was able to at least enjoy the project for what I now consider its true purpose...a $900K bathroom and teacher's lunch roomy place to benefit me. The rest of it? I couldn't give less of a rat's ass if I had a mangy rat that I hated.

Why dredge this up now? Because I'm me, of course, but also because that sets the stage for the unbridled clusterfuckery of THIS school year's start: the failure of the roof. This actually started late last year, and one would think that some sort of repair process would be good seeing as my work environment is loaded with papery things and all manner of bookishness, but that would be assuming that anyone with any power has his, her or its head out of the ass to which it belongs. Really. All summer long, instead of just letting the classrooms sit and mellow sans children, a few choice ones (mine in particular--you don't really care about the others) were allowed to fester in their own Tennessee Rain Forest. Sadly, there was no cafe added--in fact, the cafe was gutted and students and adults alike have been sentenced to sack lunch hell, but that's a rant for another day. Instead, we have a smelly, wet, bucket-filled swamp with nary an animatronic gorilla or elephant in sight.

So, that essentially pissed me off (and I made a few calls to those who don't have heads in asses--all anonymous like, of course, and brought the enlightment that was so desperately needed to the situation). Little did I know that I could be more pissed off, but when it actually, literally rains into your workspace? And soaks your furniture in a puddle of water about .25 inches deep and then leaves a malingering odor that is, as God is my witness, beyond any and all description even by the msot talented wordsmith? Well, that just tops it all and puts one in a most foul mood, although now I am awaiting the collapse of a very bulgy, nasty, sodden piece of tile that just happens to be located directly over my podium because when it falls, I plan to take off for the rest of the day at someone else's expense.

Plagues, I suppose, one could consider these. Two years ago there were mice, then came the grit, and now the water. If bugs are next, I'm officially going into early retirement. No questions asked, no debate.

Must now go prepare to face another day in my own little terrarium--if you're in the area, stop by. I'm easy to find. My classroom is the one with the duct-tape repairing the window which was broken in 1993...I wish I was joking.

Labels: ramble, rant, work stuff

Who ever coined that phrase didn't have children, pets, a yard or a house.

Yeah, I've been lazy to a point, but dammit, it's from sheer exhaustion or an attempt to hide from the 9,407 tasks that I should be doing.

I don't know why I'm always so eager for summer break every year--I'm more frantic than ever, I think.

Must go to swimming and then hurry home to pack last minute things for the boys and go drop two off for a visit to Nana and then back home to prep Sam for a tonsillectomy tomorrow. This weekend will be spent nursing him, trying to get to a t-ball ceremony and continuing the quest to find my closet floors and flat surfaces. Next week, the Goodwill man will know know me on a first name basis since I anticipate a daily, if not twice daily visit to drop stuff.

School starts in less than TWO weeks for me. I'm almost excited about it.

Labels: my life, ramble

So you ever want to get drunk for no good reason?

Just feel the temptation to drink yourself into oblivion? Once upon a time, I could drink with no regard for the after effects. I'd drink a fair amount, be blitzty and maybe have a headache the next day or feel a little funky. That was it. Every once in a great while, I had the misfortune to throw up--usually when I made the mistake to drink tequila in some form or fashion or when I just REALLY overdid it with something like beer and had some weird food, but I could probably count those times on both hands (like anyone really cares about that). Sidenote, Cary wasn't around when I had my really unfortunate run-in with tequila at the AGR house my freshman year, where I learned the hard way that one shouldn't mix gin, vodka, rum, beer, schnapps, and the evil tequila. From that day forward, the mere smell of tequila is enough to make me queasy and every other time I've tried to drink it, I've ended up sick....I remember being at The Lap once and learning that the hard way and Cary was there for that, I believe. A sink was involved, dear heavens, and some Tri Delt's shoes, perhaps...ah, good times and oh, so classy. Oh...and speaking of puking...eeek, Cary, do you remember the puking out our apartment window by the Kappa Sig? Ack! The memories. I should stop now because, well, I'm suddenly remembering things that are probably best left quashed.

And back from that digression....the point of the post was something totally different. It was...oh, yeah, it was at some point, I became old. I realized this when I became totally unable to process alcohol. Drinking sucks now because it makes me feel like total shit. That is, I feel like shit on the rare occasion I can actually drink more than one drink. Usually I don't even feel like drinking that much because I've sort of lost the taste for it. Not that I was really ever one to set out to be drunk on a regular or even semi-regular basis, but still, I did drink more than one beer at a sitting back in "the day", which was, oh, three years ago. Now it's like trying to force feed Ensure down Granny at the home for me to finish a stupid wine cooler (and yes, I actually drink the damn things. How gauche, I know). Every once in awhile, I get a whim and mix up something girly and fun like a nice daquari or something and I can manage more than one of those. If I'm with a really social group, I usually end up drinking more, too, just because I'm prone to eating or drinking in that type of setting and it's easier. However, the next day, I pay the price. I'm fairly sure that being run over by a truck and then having 1/4 of my bodily fluids drained and replaced with anti-freeze would be less painful than the way I feel. I'm essentially bedbound for at least 18 hours or so (and here is where W. would be so charming and point out that this is different than other days how?).

Of course, the burning question that most responsible adults have at this point is, why the hell do you care, Kim? You have three children and a job and a house and all those grown-uppy things. You're not supposed to be drinking and doing stupid things.

Yeah, well, good point, but that's the logical way of looking at things. It's not so much that I really WANT to sit around and get shitfaced. It's the fact that I can't do it if I want to...that just pisses me off to no end. I'm obnoxious like that. It makes me feel old and at this stage in my personal development, I'm not really particularly fond of things that make me accept my maturity. I'm rather fond of oblivion in as many forms as I can get away with it when it comes to things such as age/mortality and this is just one of those in-your-face signs that won't go away. Sort of like wrinkles, but there's not any plastic surgery for it, so I can't fool myself. And that sucks.

Labels: college friends, getting old, inebriation, ramble

I'm off to tackle a monstrous amount of laundry in a public washing facility. I do this from time to time out of sheer frustration and in order to wash the really big things all at once--spreads, blankets, coats, etc. I just found Jay's winter coat that had been left in my classroom since, what February? in a box of junk that I'd dropped at the end of school. Needless to say, it needs a wash. So, off I go--dressed in the appropriate costume of slouchy clothes and a ballcap, practically no makeup (mascara, though, natch), bottle of water, real estate book and calculater (grrrrr), and four giant receptacles filled with an assortment of things in need of laundering, some detergent, a few hangers and the fabric softener...oh, and fuckload of cash for the change machine. It's always something of a social experiment and even if I don't get much studying done, my van will smell nice and I will have plenty of blog fodder when I return.

Labels: my life, ramble, white trash